Women are wired to do for others before we take care of ourselves. Even asking God for something for ourselves may bring on guilt for being "selfish." But what if we ask for it so that WE might be in a better position to serve, to spread joy?
"Pleasure" as a word has taken on seedy connotations. (Thank you, adult toy industry, etc.) "Sensuality," same thing. It's way more than having sex! In her essay below, Danielle LaPorte takes us a step beyond the clinical-sounding "self care" to encourage us to give ourselves permission to experience pleasure. She suggests three exercises using our imagination, unlimited by constraints on time and finances.
Prioritize Pleasure
By Danielle LaPorte
By Danielle LaPorte
"Pleasure brings you into your body—and you cannot CREATE unless you are in your body.
A lot of us leave our bodies. Definitely in traumatic situations, and also in overwhelm. We're all familiar with the phrase, "You just check out." Your mind wanders. You're not attending to your breath. You are not in your sensuality. You can't have full connection when you're not embodied… so you cannot make things that will last.
When you’re more fully here, when you are BEing… human… then you can bring in the holy. And THAT’S creativity. You’re here in your pleasure, in your body, on Earth—and that’s when you bring heaven down.
Pleasure is a doorway to the divine, via your Joy. Knock, knock.
The idea is to begin shifting your pleasure priorities, so you start doing less of what you don’t like to do, and more of what you love. Start by visualizing three ideal days (based on an exercise by Abraham-Hicks): a perfect at-home day, a fantastical away day, and a day where you just love on and save the world.
Vision 1: Your Home Day Ideal 12 hours.
In everyday life, where would you be, what would you be doing, who would you be with, what would you be eating, how would you be earning, helping, creating, living, loving in a span of twelve hours? Walk through everything that would go into the waking hours of blissdom for you. Focus on ideal and don’t worry about how you’re going to make it happen. If bliss would be “I’m working in my jammies from home” and presently you’re commuting three hours to the office, write it down anyway.
In everyday life, where would you be, what would you be doing, who would you be with, what would you be eating, how would you be earning, helping, creating, living, loving in a span of twelve hours? Walk through everything that would go into the waking hours of blissdom for you. Focus on ideal and don’t worry about how you’re going to make it happen. If bliss would be “I’m working in my jammies from home” and presently you’re commuting three hours to the office, write it down anyway.
Keep your vision within the confines of space and time. Let your imagination and idealism unfurl, but… save the really impractical things like, “I wake up in Athens, lunch in Manhattan, and smoke a bedtime hookah in Rajasthan” for your Away Day fantasy. Don't worry about how it's gonna happen, okay? Just feel into the ideal.
Vision 2: Your Fantastical Away Day for 12 hours!
The next step is extravagant, fantastical, time-bending, like, if your ideal 12 would be you're lounging in Morocco, smoking a hookah, you can do that. If you want go spend the day meditating on Venus, or you want to be making love in Bali, you can be doing that. Your fantasies will tell you so much about your current reality. And in that place, what would you be eating? How would you be earning? Would you not be working at all? Would you be a nun? Would you have your own talk show? Yes. How would you be helping? I love that layer of question in both your practical and your fantastical.
The next step is extravagant, fantastical, time-bending, like, if your ideal 12 would be you're lounging in Morocco, smoking a hookah, you can do that. If you want go spend the day meditating on Venus, or you want to be making love in Bali, you can be doing that. Your fantasies will tell you so much about your current reality. And in that place, what would you be eating? How would you be earning? Would you not be working at all? Would you be a nun? Would you have your own talk show? Yes. How would you be helping? I love that layer of question in both your practical and your fantastical.
Vision 3: You love on the world for 12 hours!
What would give you pleasure in terms of being of service to the world? Meditate and pray in the morning, change laws, clean up beaches, donate, chant, cheers, work in a soup kitchen, invent a global water purifier, get everyone to come together in peace and design programs for climate restoration and children adoration? Go there!"
What would give you pleasure in terms of being of service to the world? Meditate and pray in the morning, change laws, clean up beaches, donate, chant, cheers, work in a soup kitchen, invent a global water purifier, get everyone to come together in peace and design programs for climate restoration and children adoration? Go there!"
